Recorded on March 4th, 2015

It’s my birthday today.

I should probably add an exclamation point to that announcement. Maybe later. Call it the birthday blues or this lingering, horrible winter most of us are having but my heart’s not in a joyful mood. Still, I know I have plenty to feel blessed about. This past year has been great to me when it wasn’t punching me in the gut.

One topic that has been recurring is mortality. Death has never been something I’ve spent a lot of time contemplating. I don’t even feel “my age”. Sure I spend a lot of time on career hustling, 401K monitoring, and optimizing my mortgage (because #grownassman). But I still devour pop culture, new music and video games.

However, I am getting older. And my friends are getting older. And our parents… Well, let’s just say there’s been a lot of death lately. Fatal police actions, the deaths of favorite celebrities, friends, extended family and my own mother and aunt has drilled home how life is short and precious. Sometimes I miss my mom so deeply all I can do is sit still.

Sitting still is not the answer though. My current struggle is to use memories of my mom and others to fuel positive action. It’s difficult to shift my mind to that goal but I’m trying. And there’s no better time than now to practice being a better person than I was last year, last month, or yesterday.

But first, a few cocktails, some good food, and hearty laughs with friends. That should help. 

And in case I haven’t told you lately, I love you (especially you).

Hello, World (Return Of The Blog)

Recorded on January 1st, 2015

*taps mic and clears throat*

Hello, World. Remember me? It’s okay if you don’t. It’s been a minute.

In 2013, my long-neglected WordPress blog got hacked. Instead of repairing and fortifying it, I let it go. I hadn’t been updating it anyway and the thought of dealing with plugins and databases wasn’t inspiring. As someone who creates websites and applications for a living, I relish solving these types of probems for clients. But here, I want to spend more energy on expressing my thoughts and less on managing content delivery solutions.

Even so, I’ve been thinking about my return to blogging for awhile. Especially, I regret not chronicling this past year as it was eventful.

So today, I hand-coded this post using a text editor and FTP; just like I did when I first started blogging over 15 years ago (yeah, I’ve been here since the beginning). This won’t be the final incarnation of this blog; I crave version control and maybe — just maybe — allowing comments. But there is a notable, tactile element to this process that I find rewarding. In some ways, I’ve come full circle.

If you know anything about me, that’s pretty much how I view life. If you don’tknow me: Hello, I’m J. Smith; better known on the interwebs as jbrotherlove. I took a long break from blogging. Now I’m back.

Alright. Let us find out where this goes.